怎样才能写出满分作文?新SAT官方指南写作范文赏析

2024-04-27

来源: 易伯华教育

怎样才能写出满分作文?新SAT官方指南写作范文赏析

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今天为大家带来的是新SAT官方指南OG第三篇练习题的写作范文赏析,写作阅读文章是一篇在2013年发表在《时代周刊》上的一篇文章,主要论述小孩从小就接触现代科技产品的好处。下面请看这篇写作题的范文及赏析。

材料:The Official SAT Study Guide

试卷:3

页数:620

题目:The Digital Parent Trap

范文:

In "The Digital Parent Trap", Eliana Dockterman argues that there are

benefits to early exposure to technology. Dockterman lays the foundation for her

argument by discussing the controversy surrounding the widespread use of

technology without clearing stating her own opinion. Once she reveals her

position, she builds her case by citing credible experts on the benefits of

early technology exposure and debunking the claims of technology detractors.

Although Dockterman spends more than a third of her article exploring

possible reasons why broad technology access may not be in the best interests of

children, rhetorical questions and clever wording hint that she is not fully on

board with technological dissidents. At the start of paragraph three, she pits

moms trying to "protect" their kids from technology against dads encouraging

them to "embrace it". This forces the reader to start considering the possible

pros and cons of early technology exposure. Even as she describes the

longstanding reasons why some oppose excessive technology use, careful word

choice suggests that opponents of technology are anachronistic and overly rigid

in their thinking. At the beginning of paragraph four, the capital letters in

the line "For years, the Parental Adage was simple" are a subtle condemnation of

overly simplistic thinking. Again, in paragraph five, the phrase "fundamental

aversion" suggests that those with a knee-jerk distaste for technology are

guilty of fundamentalism.

With the reader beginning to question whether fearmongering over youth

technology use is unfounded, Dockterman begins citing expert after expert on the

benefits of technology on young minds. All of the experts come from

well-respected institutions and quote impressive statistics. A professor of

anthropology describes how social networking gives kids access to new forms of

learning. Researchers at SRI, "a nonprofit research firm", explain that online

games increase students' performance on logic tests. Studies referenced by MIT

demonstrate that digital learning dramatically increases information retention

compared to more traditional methods of learning like reading, listening, and

watching demonstrations. Most important of all, technological fluency gives

students a competitive advantage in securing lucrative jobs as the STEM fields

continue to grow at a rapid pace. All of these benefits form a firm buffer

against the unproven concerns of technology opponents.

Dockterman not only quotes those who oppose technology to make her argument

appear more balanced, but she also cleverly uses them to undermine their own

cause. Unlike the advocates of technology, the opponents of technology do not

cite any statistics nor do they come from comparably impressive backgrounds.

This makes the anecdotal testimony of a Waldorf School administrator, for

example, pale in comparison with the study conducted by a UC Irvine

anthropologist. Even the screen time limits suggested by the American Academy of

Pediatrics have become outdated because they wrongly presuppose that all screen

time is as mind numbing as watching television. On the contrary, actively using

a computer or tablet can be "brain-stimulating".

By first acknowledging why some oppose extensive technology use, Eliana

Dockterman sets herself up to effectively tout its social and pedagogical

benefits. She concludes her essay with this same nuanced logic she began with by

reminding parents that despite technology's many benefits, they are still

responsible for monitoring their children's technology time and preventing

misuse.

赏析:

下面分别从新SAT文章写作的三个评分要点:reading,analysis和writing,总结满分作文的优点,并结合官方指南样题The

Digital Parent Trap的范文来加以具体分析。同时总结开头段落常用句型。

第一、 从阅读方面来看,对原文全面理解,精准掌握中心思想,有以下三个特点:

1、 中心思想,正确诠释。在The Digital Parent Trap的范文中,作者在首段和尾端简要地总结了原文的中心思想:There are

benefits to early exposure to technology; Eliana Dockerman sets herself up to

effectively tout its social and pedagogical benefits.

2、引用原文,融会贯通。满分文章的一个优点就是会大量自然地呈现原文的细节,比如原文作者所列的facts(事实)、statics(数据)、the

results of experiments (实验结果)、research(研究)或是作者的personal

anecdote(个人轶事)等。但这绝不是长篇大论的直接引用原文细节,而是通过skillful use of paraphrase and direct

quotations (巧妙地改写或者是别具匠心地直接引用)。例如,上述范文的第一主体段落就指出了原文作者Eliana Dockerman

在文中使用了生动的用词(clever wording)及修辞手段: she pits mom trying to “protect” their kids

from technology against dads encouraging them to “embrace

it”.这体现了原文的细节。可以说,这种对细节的呈现和巧妙的引用贯穿于全文的始终。

3、引用原文,精确无误。就阅读而言,评判满分文章的另一个重要标准是,在引用时不能歪曲误解原文作者的意思,更不能与原文作者的意思相悖。满分文章在引用和分析原文的论证过程中,往往能够做到与原文作者若合一契。

第二、从分析方面来看,满分文章对原文的分析有效合理。

满分作文在分析原文作者对论据,推理形式及修辞等语言手段的使用时,要分析这些要素在巩固,支撑原文作者观点中多发挥的作用,借此向考官展示自己的分析能力。比如,在上述范文中,作者不仅简单列出了Eliana

Dockerman在原文中所使用的clever wording,而且进一步的分析了这一手法在增强原文说服力上所起的作用:This forces the

readers to start considering the possible pros and cons of early technology

exposure.

第三、就写作方面而言,满分考生具备极强的英语语言使用和掌握能力,一气呵成,浑然一体。答卷使用了not only...but also, for

example, on the contrary等过渡衔接词,使文章结构紧凑,思路清晰。同时句型多变,用词精确,文体正规,语调客观。At the

beginning of paragraph four, the capital letters in the line “For years, the

Parental Adage was simple” are a sutble condemnation of overly simplistic

thinking.”

最后为大家补充开头段落常用模板句型:

• In this speech, ... raises … in order to build the argument that …

• He/She begins by …

• In the next lines, he/she establishes a kinship with his audience by

• He/She emphasizes …, suggesting that …

As anyone knows that …

• This is the point … eloquently makes in …

• By using anecdotes, examples, reasoning, and powerful imagery, …argues

that ...

When … made his/her speech in …, he/she was speaking at the height of …

• … felt strongly that …

• In this speech, he/she uses several techniques to persuade his/her

audience of his/her claim.

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怎样才能写出满分作文?新SAT官方指南写作范文赏析

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