SAT写作高分范文之wrongdoing and sins

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分享一篇关于流行的SAT写作高分范文的全部内容，非常详细，后面附有详细的点评。大家在备考关于大众观点等方面的SAT写作话题的时候，可以适当的参考一下这篇范文的内容，并对其进行借鉴和应用。

Think carefully about the following passage and the assignment below.

Prompt

Mohandas Gandhi labeled close friendships as dangerous because “friends react

on one another and sometimes loyalty to a friend will lead us into

wrongdoing.”

George Orwell stated that “sometimes one is willing to commit sins for the

sake of loyalty to others.”

Assignment

What do you think—are close friendships dangerous because they may lead us to

wrongdoing, or is it okay that we sometimes commit “sins” for the sake of

loyalty to others?

SAT写作范文

Whichever way you decide to think about closeness and giving another being

all your trust is a big part of your personality. Whether you decide to give

someone all your trust and hope they don’t turn their back on you and betray

you. Or maybe you feel that if they know nothing, they say nothing.

As Mohandas Gandhi says, maybe giving loyalty to a friend will lead us to bad

things. The more a person knows you, the easier it is to deceive you. First of

all, you already trust them and your heart will think of any excuse to prove to

yourself your friend is not an enemy.

Your friend may have an alternative side that you have no idea about. He/she

could be feeding your secrets to the “enemy.” Anybody can become your friend,

but maybe they became your friend to tell someone else what happened to you to

your “old” best friend—all those things you never wanted that person to know. Be

careful of handing out your trust as if it were mere rocks; make the recipient

earn it as if it were gold.

As for George Orwell’s opinion that it is good to have loyalty, maybe this

person will help you when you are having a hard time. Everyone loves to have a

good friend—someone you can count on to laugh with, tell stories to, crack some

jokes with. Not only is it nice to have such a person, but it is healthy. When

you have a bad day and need to let off a little steam, it is great to do that

with this person. If you allow too many things to build up inside and you are

dying to tell someone it is not at all healthy. Maybe that includes being a bit

of a “sin committer” as Orwell mentions, but these are friends that are

invaluable. They can listen to you and give support when you need it. Through

their help, you can decide just how you will face the world. You just have to be

smart enough to know not to be pressured into doing things you should not

do.

SAT写作范文点评

Shannon seems to have fallen into the trap that many writers do who respond

to such prompts. She seems to be seeing this through very narrow eyes. She has

personalized the quotations and her response. Although she attempts to separate

the two quotations, her response is actually rather generalized. For her,

friends are one’s lifeblood. Without them, one has no emotional outlet. That is

not really what the quotations are talking about.

However, she does attempt to separate the two points of view. Gandhi she

interprets more as friends ending up not trust worthy, so perhaps you should not

have them in the first place. Orwell, she agrees with more, since she feels that

havin reliable friends are worth maybe sinning a bit.

Looking at the scoring guide, this is a three response. It demonstrates

inadequate mastery, but developing skills. With some more time and work, Shannon

probably could turn this paper around. In the time she had, however, she kept

her viewpoint narrow. She took the concept of friends and friendship very

literally and personally. Although Marco’s response is not exactly global, it is

more hypothetical. It does not sound as much like a personal response to the

importance of friends and friendship in one’s life. It is important for you to

try to think outside the box, as they say. Try not to respond entirely from the

gut; attempt to respond from your mind.