12月1日(上午)托福独立写作真题范文 | 褒奖你，批评你，哪个先?

托福写作,托福写作,托福写作测试,托福写作培训,托福写作课程,易伯华教育

　2023.12.1 独立写作题目

“When we give feedback about work of our classmates or coworkers, which one

of the following should we give first?

1. The positive feedback,

2. The negative feedback.”

写作范文

Introduction

【注意段落结构，整体说来，进展要快】

句话立刻进入题目的情境：It is a commonplace that we give feedback about work of our

classmates or coworkers. 进入题目的情境之后可以有一些话语作为铺垫： We may therefore get in a

conundrum, and, in that situation, positive feedback may be more acceptable yet

misunderstood, and negative feedback may be straightforward yet upsetting.

Personally, I would approve of the job before I point out the problems. // I

would point out the problems before I approve of the job.

Body

If our choice is POSITIVE feedback：

【Teacher’s NOTE: An example of a typical paragraph of the body】

I am prepared for the idea of the opposition. One of their considerations

may be that being straightforward about the shortcomings is efficient

communication of key ideas. After all, often, when we give feedback about a job,

we are to make negative comments in the hope that the colleague or classmate can

improve upon the feedback. At this point, the positive feedback seems to be

beating around the bush. However, many of my coworkers respond unfavorably to

the criticism about their work if they are not recognized for the merits of

their performance first, and they find the negative feedback offensive. The

lesson is that we should praise the performance before we point out the

limitations, and the coworkers would otherwise feel offended. In light of the

above, courtesy is my first consideration. As a matter of fact, not only do they

feed offended, they also show strong resistance to the criticism.

【Teacher’s NOTE: However, today, we are introducing a technique in making

an argument: Consider consequences of taking the action.】

Para. 1

Recipients are likely to defend themselves and resist the criticism as the

immediate response to the negative feedback. As a result of the defensive

mechanism as part of human nature, the listener or reader becomes inaccessible

to any comments. 【Teacher’s NOTE: Consequence 1】← Contrast → The contrary is

that acclaim can open our listeners’ or readers’ mind, making our feedback,

including the negative one later, acceptable. 后文blah blah blah略。

Para. 2

As we may often give negative feedback, we may get used to picking

onothers, and the next step is that we become fussy critics and

annoying.【Teacher’s NOTE: Consequence 2】← Contrast → The opposite case is that

we develop the eye for merits of others as we are used to giving our

approvalsbefore we expect more of others. 后文blah blah blah略。

If our choice is NEGATIVE feedback:

【Teacher’s NOTE: Another technique in making an argument: Create

circumstances that narrow the general situation down to specific cases.】

Para. 1

Negative feedback should be given before positive feedback in the

case【Teacher’s NOTE: Circumstance 1】 that recipients of our feedback may

misinterpret the compliment as the whole idea of the evaluation. 后文blah blah

blah略。

Para. 2

If our purpose is for the recipients to make improvements on

theinadequacies, 【Teacher’s NOTE: Circumstance 2】 positive comments, which is

the reinforcement of what is done well, may be useless and should be after

negative feedback. 后文blah blah blah略。

Para. 3

Sometimes, as a job is poorly done, giving any positive feedback may be a

strategy that is too obvious. 【Teacher’s NOTE: Circumstance 2】 This strategy,

which may seem pretending to be nice, may be counterproductive and however

embarrass the person. 后文blah blah blah略。

Conclusion

【注意段落结构，整体说来，进展要快】

At this point, 适用于多种场景的铺垫句： we may no longer be stuck in the dilemma.

立刻明确重申自己的立场： People are advised to give some credit to others before they point

out the limitations. // People are advised topoint out the limitations of

others’ work before give their recognition.推荐阅读：支招大作文 | 可别是极端的动物保护者呀支招雅思大作文 | 一支LAMY送给你怎么灵活使用雅思写作词汇!支招小作文 | 惊了!表里没几个数字~