3月4日的雅思作文这么写，不好上7

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3月4号雅思写作话题：Many students after they leave school have a negative attitude towards

learning. what causes this?And how to solve this?

考官零距离：48篇9分大小作文考官范文解读与下载

学生答题原文：

Many school leavers consider learning as a tedious thing in a modern society.

I would argue that schools can take some measures to mitigate this problem

caused by only focusing on theories and academic performance.

Some primary or secondary schools attach more importance to theories than

practice, and students in these schools possibly lose interest in some

theoretical subjects such as maths, science and physics, since they do not know

how to apply such knowledge into practice. This is why they would have a

negative attitude toward learning after school. For example, those studying

science may not have a clear idea of how to utilize scientific knowledge when

they enter the workforce.

Another reason of this issue is that some schools tend to give priority to

educational attainment. Young people would feel under great pressure at school,

and they may choose to memorize formulas related to some theoretical subjects

including mathematics and chemistry, which would place their passionabout study

in jeopardy. Their parents also pay close attention to their grades rather than

their interests. This means that these students would have a negative attitude

towards learning.

In my opinion,schools and teachers can organize activities associated with

some core subjects such as Chinese, maths and English, thereby encouraging them

to acquire the knowledge related to these subjects.Consequently,their study

interest would be sparked, and they tend to be more willing to learn at school

or after they leave school. English speech competition, for instance, can

encourage students to practice English more at school, and they are more likely

to devote more time in learning English even after they leave school.

In conclusion, schools can take some measures to encourage students to learn

at school or after they leave school.

点评：

这个同学语法没什么问题，6分肯定会有的，但是是否6.5分就要看运气。

1. 主体部分前两段都比较重复，到了后半段，也没去解释原因，举例也不具体，延伸也不好，都是草草结尾。

2. 主体部分第三段也不是很扣题，更加像是在说学校怎么提高小孩对学习的兴趣，问题是现在是解决小孩毕业后对学习态度问题。

3. 结尾也是草草结尾，基本上是抄了题目，考官会觉得你没有很强的表达能力。