实例评点雅思写作10大爆款级“见官死”开头

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“见官死”开头之一：磨磨唧唧 罗哩罗嗦

典型失败案例： Topic 1-Should college students be allowed to get married?

This topic is very interesting. I’m very interested in talking about this

topic. Because I’m also a college student and I’m not married……

修改方案：开门见山 直奔主题

In my opinion, it would not be a wise decision to allow college students to

get married。

Topic 2-Will modern technology, such as the Internet, ever replace the book

or the writing word as the sole source of information? (雅思真题)

Ok, this topic is a very good topic. First, let me tell you a story: I have a

friend, he likes go on the internet very much. Every day, he uses internet to

read news or play internet games. So we can see the internet is more and more

important in our daily life.

Topic 3-The importance of environmental protection

Oh, this topic is surely very important. Isn’t it? Of course! It’s really

very very important!

“见官死”开头之二：中式英文人见人晕

典型失败案例：Topic 1-The happiest moment in your life

In our life, there are always some moments which make your heart flower

opened angrily……

Topic 2- The population problem

The population problem is a very big problem. For example, in the city

centers of Shanghai, we can always see people mountain people sea there.

Topic3- Is there fairness in today’s business world?

I think in today’s society, there is no fairness in the business world. For

example, I always chopped when I go out buy things……

Topic 4- The advantage of being a nice person

Being a nice person have many advantage. I believe if a people always do bad

things, he will get “baoying”.

“见官死”开头之三：观点模糊态度暧昧

典型失败案例： Topic-Should college students be allowed to get married?

I think this topic is very hard to say. Because I am still very little, only

17, and not married, so this topic is very difficult for me……

“见官死”开头之四：偏离主题无轨电车

典型失败案例：Topic-It is said that nowadays one can not acquire the qualifications

and quality essential to success through university education. To what extent do

you agree or disagree with the statement? (雅思真题)

I think to success, we must have a lot of important qualities. To have these

important qualities, we must learn a lot of things, for example, English, music

tools, and etc. We can learn these qualities from our teachers, our friends and

from books. All in all, we can learn from many places.

“见官死”开头之五：语法错误惨不忍睹

典型失败案例：Topic-If children behave badly, should their parents accept

responsibility and also be punished? (雅思真题)

About this problem, my think is if children behave badly, then parents are

not right. Because teach child is parent’s responsibility. So we also punish

parents too besides children is also should.

“见官死”开头之六：过分简单没有重点

典型失败案例：Topic-The importance of environmental protection

This issue is surely very important, let’s talk about it!

“见官死”开头之七：用词不当 表达不准

典型失败案例：Topic-Should college students be allowed to get married?

I think college students should not be allowed to get married because they

are very young and so we can’t take the responsibility to form a family.

“见官死”开头之八：意思重复原地踏步

典型失败案例：Topic-Your opinion on DINK families

My opinion on DINK families is that DINK families is not a good thing. And it

is a bad thing. It brings no benefits to our society and it is even sometimes

harmful to our society.

“见官死”开头之九：中国俗语胡乱翻译

典型失败案例：Topic 1-Is it good to have a large family?

I think it is good to have a large family. Because we Chinese believe a

sentence: “Many sons, many lucks”……

正确说法：Happiness lies in having many children

Topic 2 -Should we pretend to know everything or admit our ignorance?

We all know, our Chinese old fathers and grandfathers said: “Know is know,

don’t know is don’t know”……

Topic 3- Do you think one’s character is greatly influenced by his/her

family?

Chinese old words says very good: Dragon born dragon, phoenix born phoenix,

rat’s son can make hole……

Topic 4- The advantage of being a nice person

I believe one sentence:“A good person is all life safe”. We Chinese people

always say: “Good has good pay, bad has bad pay”.

“见官死”开头之十： 观点武断 态度强硬

典型失败案例：Topic1-The importance of confidence

In my opinion, confidence is the most important thing for a person. All the

successful people in the world are full of confidence. While those people who

don’t have confidence, they all have failed.

Topic 2 - The solution to the traffic problem

I think to solve the traffic problem, very easy! For those who don’t obey the

traffic rules, we should put all of them into prison. If we do that, I’m sure

there will be no traffic problem any more.